Personal Life Slacking

Mr W and I have this phrase personal life slacking. It very much means exactly what it says. We are slacking on our personal lives.

Now I don't mean slacking on our relationship, although our goal of bi-monthly dates sometimes looks like devouring a season of How I Met Your Mother on Netflix [in preparation for the final season starting this Sept!] while I make homemade pizza. I mean we are slacking on the [gestures hands] general area of social life outside of work life.

In risk of sounding melodramatic, if we're not at work, we seem to be recovering from work.  I realize I must be very careful to talk about this because both Josh and I think we have been blessed with slightly greater than average awesome jobs. I wont go into specifics other than a sampling of evidence..

As you can see there are plenty of reasons to spend extra time at work. And if Mr W and I were both single instead of married, it'd probably be a huge perk to us. However, we are awesomely married to each other and don't appreciate repetitive evenings spent at home, alone without our companion when we work at companies located in our neighborhood.  Thank The Lord for short commutes!

California Silicon Valley is so weird in a way in that work appears so awesome that we feel ready to give it all of ourselves. I'm not being melodramatic here, neither of us can recall a big-person job we honestly looked forward to almost every day. If we said so previously, it was because we had yet to be enlightened. 

Our jobs can tempt us pretty hard to spend just a little extra time at work instead of home.  There is a huge problem with this though, we give our best selves to our coworkers instead of to each other. Some days [trying to make this less often but I still totally fail] I am completely spent from having used up all of my social-ness on people at the gym.  On those days I can't listen to Mr W. tell me about his work, successes and anxieties. That is when my patience is drier than the Mojave desert and I'm totally not giving him the fresh-and-able-to-listen-and-respond-wife that I am called to be. Now this doesn't mean Mr W. is a saint; he has his days too but I am not about airing his dirty laundry.  However, mine is fair game.

So I've cut back on my hours at the gym, though I do love what working there does for my inner-child extrovert self. Mr W. has made our [mini] vacations a priority on his calendar. Some morning coffees he spends with me instead of pouring over his inbox. We set two alarms for church on Sundays because we STRUGGLE to get going on the weekends. No plans get made for Sunday afternoon so we can freely chat over lunch. I have made more friends with wifes of Mr W's co-worker's. Mr W and I make time each week for each other that is non-negotiable. However, on the occasion that a once in a lifetime opportunity comes up [funny these come up way more often since we moved out of the Midwest] I totally encourage Mr W to prioritize for it. Usually it means way more hours away from me and our home but I know this is temporary.  Notice I said prioritize, which means we try to ascribe to the whole emotional bank account. Meaning deposit before you over withdraw. Took us a lot of IOU's to figure out we didn't yet truly understand that system.

Living in California has completely strengthened our marriage because it's thrown so many 'nice things' at it that sometimes it feels too easy to be distracted by something new and shiny. But --we've also got a loooooot of work ahead of us!

slack no more

-Mrs W

24 years ..part I

Having a birthday right after the New Year, I equate new year to new age.

A brief recap of how I spent 24:

Josh rang in my 24th birthday with a surprise trip to Tiffany's.  He brought me into the store and told me to pick out whatever I wanted. Probably every girl's dream.  Well, a sales woman heard him exclaim this she promptly lead me to the platinum and diamonds counter.  After lots of trying on, we left the store with these gorgeous silver bow earrings.  Which, actually turned into a hilarious story that I'll need to explain in more detail because Mr. W realized such an open ended statement could have lead to trouble!  I really did marry the most wonderful man in the world.

bows

My mom and sister visited; we went to wine country and ate wonderful food here.

Mr. W's dad, sister and best man visited our little 2 bedroom apartment.  We hiked at Angel Island, Ano Nuevo and had hours of glorious family time.

Mr. W. Sister (in law). Mr. W's Best Man.

Family.

Angel Island

Sausalito

Ano Nuevo.

elephant seals!

We spent Easter weekend hiking in Point Reyes and vowed to fight each other less and hike more.

through the woods.

the coast.

I planned a last minute backpacking trip through the Ventana Wilderness just south of Big Sur.  I remember this trip as the time we learned to really depend the Lord's plan for our marriage.  There was no nagging, no yelling, no you suck because. We worked as a TEAM thanks to the Lord for answering our prayers to strengthen our marriage. #winningformarriage! Afterwards we stopped at Barb's Fish Trap, a must go to if traveling any where near Half Moon Bay.

Ventana Wilderness

Refueling.

Mr. W finally convinced me to try out a nearby rock gym. I couldn't get enough.  We climbed 4 days in a row.  My hands were shredded and I had knots from my knuckles to my eye balls but I was in heaven on earth.

We walked in the Bay To Breaker's Parade.  I dub this my first city experience.  It was memorable enough that I've retired from participating ;)

Willy Wonka and his crew.

My dad came to visit for the US Open in the city.  We use any visit from family or friends as an excuse to explore like tourists :)

my dad's visit.

We took 2 days off for a last minute trip to Tahoe with family friends. I climbed outside for the first time at 90 ft wall.

90 ft wall near Eagle Falls.

Angora Lake.

We planned a backpacking trip in Yosemite with a group of co-workers. I conquered my fear of heights and hiked Half Dome. We also hiked to the Cascades near Little Yosemite Valley and spent a day riding a natural water slide.

half dome.

Stretching out for the climb.

water slide.

At Mr. W's prompting, I participated in our rock gym's top rope series and I some how walked out with 2nd place in women's beginner level. Rock climbing became our thing.

We climbed more. This time near Table Scraps in Sonoma County.

Table Scraps

I competed in our rock gym's grip challenge.  This was my first time dead lifting on a fat bar any bar.  I went out at 155.

I look like I'm about to die.  Photo credit.

We took a trip back to the Midwest.  Saw family, friends, had rest and recuperated in hammocks.  I spent every morning near the water talking with the Lord and He healed my soul of many earthly things I had been holding on to since we moved.

Family. Photo Credit.

Sister (in law) and I at the grandparents lake house.

Mr. W can fly.

I completed the Tough Mudder in Tahoe and was dubbed hard core by our mostly male team.  For anyone who is curious, the electric shock obstacles really do pack a punch.  If any one has ever told you it was no big deal, here's a secret, there is actually a power on/off switch.  I assure you it was on when I ran through.  My heart does not normally jump like that for kicks ;)

Before the race.

Mr. W tore his acl playing Ultimate Frisbee and I planned less intense hiking trips for the fall. Our criteria for less intense meant the trail had to be flat with ample parking close by.  We felt like posers.

Mr. W got a new job.  I quit my job.  And then we moved to Hawaii..

Hawaiian roller coaster ride.

Tune in for part II
-Mrs W

update: here is Part II

hello world

At the prompting of my husband, Mr Waytoburn, this space has been born.

I've always enjoyed writing down my thoughts. My first journal was given to me in 1994 by my mom.  It had Tweety Bird on the cover and I was going into 1st grade.  It eventually filled up and I moved onto less cartoon-covered journals.

I've felt pretty overcome by change for the last year and have struggled to write as consistently as I used to. I graduated from college in June 2011.  Mr W. and I were married in August, 2011.  We relocated to Northern California two weeks later and moved in with my Aunt.  Then, we moved into our first apartment and adopted two cats.  2012 was a year spent exploring this new state of being Californians.  Cut to November 2nd, 2012, my first day as a full-time wife/home-maker.  I was full-time, career woman no more.

I just need to breathe after reading through it all.

With each of these changes, I've sort of simply said "yes" to each one.  I didn't pour over my options. There wasn't a whole lot of back and forth discussions and I didn't teeter on the edge of decision.

I also feel like I haven't digested the past two years.  I sort of feel like I swallowed a saltine cracker whole and need to chip away at it before I choke. Which, is what this blog is for. It is also to relieve Mr W. of my cray-cray woman talk.  The poor man can only pretend to be interested in blogs, decorating, photography and all things "woman" for so long in our marriage.


Hello World,

I'll take cream in my life but hold the sugar because sugar is only sweetening what is already delicious and I hate to be wasteful, please.

Yours truly,
Mrs W

Hello World.