Jump. (No 7)

In the days following our kayak date, Mr W and I would continue to talk during work hours via office communicator, planning several more boating trips.  I would help him pack up the boat and take it back to his aunt's house. Afterwards we would drive together back to town, usually stopping for dinner at Subway or at 7-11 for Slurpee's, chatting the entire way.  

One night, after the obligatory Subway stop for dinner, we stopped at Plymouth Park, a block away from Mr W's childhood home. We walked laps around the park, sharing about hopes/dreams and failures/disappointments.  At one point in our endless lapping of the park, Mr W noticed a gazebo with a fairly flat rooftop and stopped abruptly in front of it.  Anyone who knew him growing up could see this part coming. On the side of the gazebo were 2 plastic trash cans with lids on top. He walked over, grabbed a can and rolled it to just underneath the ledge of the roof.  Within 20 seconds he was perched on the top of the gazebo roof, extending out an arm.  I can't remember any words being exchanged until I was standing atop the trash can, lacking a few inches in height to swing my legs up onto the roof.  I must have something like "help pull me up" and he held my hands for some balance until I not-so-skillfully pulled myself a safe distance from the edge of the roof.  

Mr W was lying back on the roof-top, hands behind his head, gazing up at the clear Michigan night sky. I instinctively did the same, though less gracefully as I was trying to keep the tar roof-top from sand-papering too much of my elbows. 

It must have been at least 15 minutes -which is a long time now that I think about it to have not said anything- until Mr W shared an earth shattering "look at the sky".  Which, was less like sharing and more like a statement of what we were doing. I replied back with an equally fascinating observation of "yea, its amazing".  Deep, emotional stuff was being exchanged here people. A few more cliches were said that are usually shared under a starry sky.  Mr W again broke the silence, wondering out load about what God intended for us. 

My brain didn't understand, what do you mean what God intended for us? He continued wondering out loud; about his heart’s desire, God's plan, Heaven.  I remember key phrases because while he was deep in thought, I was mentally sweating.  I was trying to draw upon 12 years of private, Catholic education to recall information on any of the things he was saying.  I was blank. I remembering singing songs about Jesus loving us, studying the crusades and learning God knew all of our sins. What he was talking about sounded so.. personal, so real. I finally interjected, trying to sit up and look at him while forgetting I was on a slanted roof-top and beginning to slide down. "What do you mean about God's plan? God has a plan?". He sat up also [without sliding around on the roof I might add] and told me that the Lord has plans for all of us which intend for us to live for Him. 

Mr W mused "What if we actually all loved each other like God intended? What would the world be like? What would our lives be like?".  I asked if that was really possible, if everyone could really be good just because God made them.  Josh simply replied with "God created all of this [life], every person was created in His image. And He did [all of this for us] out of love." I said that is a really cool thought, how did you come up with that? His response "I didn't, it's all in the Bible". 

Dumbfounded, embarrassed and very curious were a few of the feelings I had.  I'd grown up reading the bible, well reading it from a this-is-going-to-be-on-the-test perspective. Which , is where I now know how I missed focusing about God being a loving, creative and all-powerful God. Mr W loves God and God loves him and I saw how confident Mr W was in that love.  I was beyond curious and frankly, I felt like I had been left out of something big all my life.

Time was rushing past us, I usually started work at 715am, our conversation needed to be put on pause.  Mr W climbed down off the roof-top and as he reached the top of the trash can I called out "Wait! How am I going to get down?” He paused from his spot, standing on the can's plastic lid, looked down the ground then back up at me hovering at the edge of the roof.  The moment he reached out his arms "Jump"; the plastic lid buckled under his weight, denting inward towards the ground.  In one fluid motion I pushed off the roof's ledge, my feet landing on the mere inches left of the collapsing piece of plastic. Mr W's arms surrounded me to stabilize my landing.  The plastic lid could stand no more and quickly folded underneath our feet.  We jumped off merely escaping the remaining 5 foot tumble onto concrete.  

The following summer we would be in Michigan again, walking around that same park.  Only this time it was during the day and we would notice how that roof-top was roughly 12 feet off the ground.  A detail neither of us deemed important that first night at the park.

-Mrs W


..and what do you do?

I have a new job.

Well, I'd use the term job loosely.   I have a new take on life and it begins with my employment status.  See, I've started working at a rock gym and I hardly view what I do as "work".  Its more like I get to play at a gym with people who use the words double fisherman, crimp, jug, sequenced and projecting in regular conversation. The climbing community is an awesome one.  It is a very inclusive in a-kids-coming-together-on-the-playground kind of way.  Everyone is allowed to play, regardless of rank. And everyone cheers each other on in a new accomplishment. There are a few exceptions but those people aren't the rule.

For anyone who doesn't agonize over the details of my life <read no one> I left my job in November 2012 and have been floating ever since.  I have been sitting on the couch, eating bon bons watching Downton Abbey. I do stuff like laundry, pay bills, clean and take care of our new dwarf lemon tree named Bob.

Meet Bob
There has been a significant reduction of stress in my life. I had the bad sort of worldly stress. Stressing about how I spend my approx 12 days of vacation, how much I know about so-and-so's position at work, or why I wasn't invited to a meeting that obviously involved my job. I stressed over worldly stuff.  I still have stress but its manageable.

See, I'm really trying to do this thing a friend once told me about working for the Lord. That friend is named Heather and she just recently gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. Talk about doing work for God! When I worked at my old job, I was doing it for ME. For selfish reasons of feeling I had to prove myself to someone.  Last time I checked, my husband, family, close friends and certainly not God have ever asked me to prove my existence.

Anyway, back to working at the gym. One afternoon my husband very blankly told me to DO SOMETHING. An hour later I was dropping an application off at the gym. It was a surprise after a month of not hearing back I got a call for the job at the perfect moment. Mr W was just about to leave for a 2 week business trip. We (husband and I) were worried I'd sink into a couch surfing bum. But God provided for me a way fill up my days and a way to meet new friends. The killer biceps have also been a pretty nice perk ;)

That pipe dream just became a teeny bit more plausible though, I'm still intent on walkin' where the Lord leads.

-Mrs. W